When you walk down the toy aisle in a store what do you see? What kind of toys are there? Are there dolls? Tea sets? What about costumes? Are there dresses and sparkly play shoes? Who do you think would play with these? Certainly not little boys right?

Growing up I always noticed the division between boys and girls. The toys, the clothes, even how they’re treated is different. Girls are thought to be dainty little dolls who love frilly things and shriek at the sight of bugs and rodents. They are treated like fragile beings and told to ‘act like a lady’ from an early age. On the other hand boys are thought to be tough and rowdy. They’re thought to love messy things, creepy things, and hate anything even remotely feminine.

In school these differences stuck out to me even more. When the boys pushed each other around, the teachers would look the other way saying ‘boys will be boys’, but the moment that same boy pushed a girl they would rush in immediately. They would scold that boy for being inconsiderate and explain to him why it was different. It infuriated me! Why should girls get special treatment? Why not reprimand him when he pushed the other boy? It made no sense to me! During the next few years I continued to notice how people separated us. I also noticed how people seamed to form into these stereotypes to avoid ridicule. I refused to do this though, I continued to love playing in the dirt and rough housing with the boys. I wore baggy clothes and even cut my hair pretty short. I thought nothing of it until I moved.

The first day of school is always hard for the new kid, but mine felt even harder that year. People kept mistaking me for a boy and seamed really surprised when I turned out to be a girl. It only got worse though. During recess everyone went outside to play, a small group of boys went to play football. When I asked to join, they told me I couldn’t play with them because I was a girl, and would probably cry if I got pushed, or fell. I was reasonably upset by this and stormed off. Throughout the day the other kids would say that I wouldn’t be mistaken for a boy if I had longer hair and wore girlier clothes. I didn’t like that. Why should I change the way I dress and act? I didn’t understand.

Eventually I did grow out my hair but I’m still not quite what you’d call ‘feminine’ exactly, but I don’t really care. Some girls and boys like frills and dolls, some like nerf and wrestling, and some like a combination of both. It doesn’t matter, but if people just assume all the time, then no-one will be happy.